2 replies to this topic

[Rhodri]

> In case you have been waiting breathlessly for this year's Darwin Awards,
> here they are. The awards this year are, once again, truly classic. These
> awards are given each year to bestow upon (the remains of) that
individual,
> who through single-minded self-sacrifice, has done the most to remove
> undesirable elements from the human gene pool. Just think... until these
> events, these same people were walking the streets like normal people.
>
>
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> 5th RUNNER-UP: Goes to a San Anselmo, California man who died when he hit
a
> lift tower at the Mammoth Mountain ski area while riding down the slope on
a
> foam pad. The 22-year old David Hubal was pronounced dead at Central
Mammoth
> Hospital. The accident occurred about 3 a.m., the Mono County Sheriff's
> department said. Hubal and his friends apparently had hiked up a ski run
> called Stump alley and undid some yellow foam protectors from lift towers,
> said Lt. Mike Donnelly of the Mammoth Lakes Police Department. The pads
are
> used to protect skiers who might hit towers. The group apparently used the
> pads to slide down the ski slope and Hubal crashed into a tower. It has
> since been investigated and determined the tower he hit was the one with
its
> pad removed.
>
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> 4th RUNNER-UP: Goes to Robert Puelo, 32, was apparently being disorderly
in
> a St. Louis market. When the clerk threatened to call the police, Puelo
> grabbed a hot dog, shoved it into his mouth and walked out without paying.
> Police found him unconscious in front of the store. Paramedics removed the
> six-inch wiener from his throat where it had choked him to death.
>
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> 3rd RUNNER-UP: Goes to poacher Marino Malerba of Spain, who shot a stag
> standing above him on an overhanging rock and was killed instantly when it
> fell on him.
>
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> 2nd RUNNER-UP: "Man loses face at party." A man at a West Virginia party
> (probably related to the winner last year, a man in Arkansas who used the
> .22 bullet to replace the fuse in his pickup truck) popped a blasting cap
> into his mouth and bit down, triggering an explosion that blew off his
lips,
> teeth, and tongue. Jerry Stromyer, 24, of Kincaid, bit the blasting cap as
a
> prank during the party late Tuesday night, said Cpl. M.D. Payne. "Another
> man had it in an aquarium hooked to a battery and was trying to explode
it."
> "It wouldn't go off and this guy said I'll show you how to set it off." He
> put it into his mouth, bit down and it blew all his teeth out and his lips
> and tongue off, Payne said. Stromyer was listed in guarded condition
> Wednesday with extensive facial injuries, according to a spokesperson at
> Charleston Area Medical Division. "I just can't imagine anyone doing
> something like that," Payne said.
>
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> 1st RUNNER-UP: Doctors at Portland University Hospital said an Oregon man
> shot through the skull by a hunting arrow is lucky to be alive and will be
> released soon from the hospital. Tony Roberts, 25, lost his right eye last
> weekend during an initiation into a men's rafting club, Mountain Men
> Anonymous (probably known now as Stupid Mountain Men Anonymous) in Grants
> Pass, Oregon. A friend tried to shoot a beer can off his head, but the
arrow
> entered Robert's right eye. Doctors said that had the arrow gone
> 1 millimeter to the left, a major blood vessel would have been cut and
> Roberts would have died instantly. Neurosurgeon Doctor Johnny Delashaw at
> the University Hospital in Portland said the arrow went through 8 to
> 10 inches of brain with the tip protruding at the rear of his skull, yet
> somehow managed to miss all major blood vessels. Delashaw also said that
had
> Roberts tried to pull the arrow out on his own he surely would have killed
> himself. Roberts admitted afterwards that he and his friends had been
> drinking that afternoon. Said Roberts, I feel so dumb about this." No
> charges have been filed, but the Josephine County district attorney's
office
> said the initiation stunt is under investigation.
>
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> Now, THIS YEAR'S WINNER:
> (The late) John Pernicky and his friend, (the late) Sal Hawkins, of the
> great state of Washington, decided to attend a local Metallica concert at
> the George Washington amphitheater. Having no tickets (but having had
> 18 beers between them), they thought it would be easy to "hop" over the
nine
> foot fence and sneak into the show. They pulled their pickup truck over to
> the fence and the plan was for Mr. Pernicky, who was 100 pounds heavier
than
> Mr. Hawkins) to hop the fence and then assist his friend over. Unfortunate
> for (the late) Mr. Pernicky, there was a 30-foot drop on the other side of

> the fence. Having heaved himself over, he found himself crashing through a
> tree. His fall was abruptly halted (and broken, along with his arm) by a
> large branch that snagged him by his shorts. Dangling from the tree with a
> broken arm, he looked down and saw some bushes below him. Possibly
figuring
> the bushes would break his fall, he removed his pocket knife and proceeded
> to cut away his shorts to free himself from the tree. Finally free, Mr.
> Pernicky crashed into holly bushes. The sharp leaves scratched his ENTIRE
> body and now, without the protection of his shorts, a holly branch
> penetrated his rectum. To make matters worse, on landing his pocket knife
> penetrated his thigh. Hawkins, seeing his friend in considerable pain and
> agony, threw him a rope and tried to pull him to safety by tying the rope
to
> the pickup truck and slowly driving away. However, in his drunken
> haste/state, he put the truck into reverse and crashed through the fence
> landing on his friend and killing him. Police arrived to find the crashed
> pickup with its driver thrown 100 feet from the truck and dead at the
scene
> from massive internal injuries. Upon moving the truck, they found John
under
> it half-naked, scratches on his body, a holly stick in his rectum, a knife
> in his thigh, and his shorts dangling from a tree branch 25 feet in the
air.
> Congratulations gentlemen, you win...

[Steve]

From the darwin awards page.

http://www.darwinawa...win2002-38.html

This car park is in my girlfreinds home town. Only been past it once but it just has to be done. I'm blatently gonna end up with a darwin award.

Steve

[Matt]

There ya go pyromaster, holly trees do have a use for something!